My first cover! Yay, I am moving up in the legacy world. Ok, for any first time readers, I should warn you that this is not your ordinary legacy. You see I am trying, actually trying, to get the ugliest sim I can in 10 generations. This is my 6th generation heir gracing my cover... Queenie Uglacy. She's bringing into the Uglacy family the alien gene, and we all know it doesn't get any uglier than that. She and her sister Regan have just started college at that academy... Le La Tour...whatever... you know... the fancy one.

Queenie had a little "incident" when she arrived at the dorms. I've never done a vampire through college, at least not without massive amounts of cheating, so I decided to give it a go for that whopping extra point! Shall we count how many times I kill her?

Regan, Queenie's sister, is off to college too, but she's the spare so for the most part she can do what she wants. I can't seem to get her away from the pineapple keg. But she has one important job!!! Are you listening Regan?! You are to plead for Queenie's life when she burns in the sun... which knowing my poor simming abilities will be a full-time job. So at least stay sober enough for that, mmkay?

Also enlisted to assist the heir is Ralph Uglacy, son of Robert and Marylena Uglacy and official dorm holder. He will be doing all of Queenie's term papers.

"Hey wait a minute..."

Oh shut up and eat your mac and cheese Ralph. Just get her through school and I'll put you up in some house with a motherlode of money.

"Hmm, what classes to pick to be a professional party guest? I know, I'll sign up for..."

"Boozing 101, followed by Recognizing the Creepy Stalker Guy 211."

Good semester planning, Queenie, those are skills that will last you a lifetime.

And don't forget "Burning in the Sun 301!"

Time to get Queenie some sunblock... 500.

Quick, code red! Rush the vampire to the energizer! I can tell this is going to be a long 4 years!!!

Eeeeek!!! Queenie apparently isn't the only one having problems!

"I'm meeeelting."

Please, please don't let this glitch be permanant. On the other hand, I am going for ugly here. Might be an advantage for me.

For the 100th time Queenie... keep your vampire butt in the coffin!

Hello, are all vampires this stupid? Sunlight bad, coffin good! I have to watch her constantly, I think she has a suicidal tendency.

Ilama dude, you wake my vampire up and I'm going postal on you. Back away from the coffin, she is not interested in your Gerbit dance routine.

"Do I have to stay a vampire, I hate it."

What?! You get to party all night, never go to class, and turn into a bat! What's not to love?!

"Uh, burning to death in the sunlight."

Pffft, small inconvenience.

Elmer Fudd just caught the kitchen on fire again. Geesh! I mean it must be hard boiling water for the constant supply of macaroni and cheese. Or maybe that pancake mix is really flammable.

Here's a guy who knows how to enjoy life. JFizzle, out on the town, swinging on the swings, seriously, what would you really think if you saw this? A grown man knocking kids over so he can swing with a big, goofy smile on his face. I would think he needed medication. Lots and lots of medication. Or maybe he is on medication... lots and lots of medication.

By the way JFizzle writes an excellent legacy about the Rynos... put it on your must read list, after you get done with mine of course :)

Meanwhile, while the kids are off to college, Gage Uglacy is out on the town. And this time he meets up with Hiddenunderabed, who has been avoiding Gage since he was a teen. She was, after all, his first crush. Maybe it's all those senoir citizen's discounts, or the wearing down of me and other Shoo Flee members, but Mel has finally agreed to go out on a date with Gage.

Not only that but Hiddenunderabed has started a new legacy about PSG!!! She's giving me a run for ugly now.

They go, of course, bowling! I mean with Hidden's spiffy bowling outfit, it only seemed right. Apparently her sim self takes bowling very seriously.

Alright, a strike! Nothing like an exciting date with Gage Uglacy at the Sugar Cube bowling alley!
Hey do I see a butt shot?!! Well not quite as good as getting some poor simself in a bathing suit... no names mentioned, cough, cough, Mel!

Gage rolls a strike as well, which is good, because they have partnered up against the notorious...

Kennedy Cox! Whose arrogancy is so bad that he actually...

Does a victory dance in the middle of the lane. And his bowling was not that impressive. What do you think, Kennedy, you're bowling for dollars?! Scored a touchdown for the Super Bowl? Geek!

"Oh Gage, I am so repulsed and yet compelled by you at the same time!"

"Ewww, I can't believe I just kissed Gage Uglacy."

Neither can we, Mel. But whatever it takes for a dream date, eh?

To mark the "special" event, Hiddenunderabed has a photo done of her and Gage.

"This is a great date, Hidden, hasn't it been terrific?"

"Well to my amazement I am platinum. I guess you're not all bad Gage."

"Hey, how about we go to your place for a drink."

"Um, ok I guess."

*whistling innocently* What, do you really think I would do anything bad to a simself??? Ok, you know me, I would.

The photo is immediatly followed by Hidden leaping into Gage's arms, which I totally did not expect.

"This lady has a screw loose, has she seen that mug?!"

Well Kennedy, what can I say? Eccentric Legacy writers, we're an odd bunch.

"Gage, I actually had a good time. How did you know I loved bowling?"

"Uh, well, maybe the bowling shoes."

Awww, the goodnight kiss. What a great date it would have been...

"Frederico! Uh, what are you doing here?!"

"Hiddenunderabed! How could you betray me like this... with, with that thing! I thought we had something special. I was the founder of your legacy, the love of your life... we even had matching bowling shoes!"

"Really Mel, I am so disappointed. Did you think I wouldn't find out?!"

"But Frederico, you know you're my real love. We were just bowling."

"Uh, um, Hidden, we were kissing and there was the leaping into my arms, and..."

"Shut up Gage, you're not helping!"

"Alright Candi, how did Frederico get into your legacy, huh?"

Um, wow, I don't know. Really Mel.

"Yeah, right. You just wait, I'll get you for this."

No doubt you will, Hidden. But you did agree to date Gage.

"Not with Frederico watching! Man, now I am going to have to apologize till the cows come home!"

Speaking of which... "Elsie I'm home."

Got Milk?

No, but I have a tombstone of Life and Death and a bottle of Heinz 57 with your name on it.

Back at college, Ralph is not happy.

"Why do I have to do all their assignments. This sucks, its so unfair."

Yeah, yeah, well its your job. Besides the girls are busy and all.

Queenie has taken up a part-time job in a local circus. I mean who wouldn't want to see a juggling alien vampire. I know I'd pay at least a quarter for that.

And Regan has developed a serious expresso addiction, and constantly whines to me about her need to pee.

Well go ahead Regan, geesh, I know you were painstakingly potty-trained, so why all the confusion? Why do I have to click on the potty all the time!

Meanwhile, I devise methods to vampire dorm-living. This is against all that I have learned about vampires, who according to forklore at least want their coffin in a basement. But the time it takes to get to her room is just too painful for both Queenie and me, so her coffin awaits her at the corner on the sidewalk. She pops in, she pops out... she's a sophmore with a 4.0 that hasn't died yet. Living her life like a Jack in the Box.

This is a very confused stalker who thinks Samara still lives here. This time he left us a gnome.

Dude, that was last generation. Get a clue. And a haircut. And a new victum. Oh yeah, and maybe a therapist.

'Arrrrgh, sunlight! Would it kill you to put some blinds up?"

If you would keep your butt in the coffin and stop trying to sneak to the pinball machine, this wouldn't be a problem.

"Man, what is your problem, and what the heck are you doing in the girl's bathroom you perv?!"

"I'm Dorian, member of the secret society police, and you have been befriending the wrong people Regan Uglacy."

"I don't want any trouble from you, just come along quietly..."

"Hey weren't you that cop that broke up my 5th birthday party?"

"Um, that was my dad. He's the Dirty Harry of the sim police force."

"Yeah, breaking up kid's birthday parties... geesh, I'm surprised he didn't pull out his Magnum 44 right there and gun down Claribel the Clown."

"Miss Uglacy, what part of comming along quietly don't you understand?"

"Hey sis, this pervert is taking me away in handcuffs."

"Oh, ok Regan, have a nice time."

Welcome to the Secret Society, Regan, note all those Uglacies on the wall behind you. This is a time-honored tradition.

"Yeah, great, now get me out of this den of nerds before the cowplant eats someone."

"Hi, uh dad. I would have thought you'd be out of college by now."

"Ha, ha, Regan, well I am going for my tenth Master's degree. I give new meaning to making a career out of college."

Remington is just afraid to live life outside a college campus. And so he stays... forever leading the secret society.

Not to be outdone by her older sister, Queenie is soon invited to join as well.

"I come in peace."

Yeah, yeah, we all know Queenie. You and that "ET" friendly, alien attitude.

"Hey, do you two mind. I was going to have a soak before class. Like get a room!"

Regan has a boyfriend, Regan has a boyfriend! Meet Samuel Ebadi, she liked him, it's close to Valentines day, I thought, why not?

How Uglacies get through school...

"What, you think I look like like Brad Pitt? And you want me to write your term paper, why of course!"

"You say I remind you of Lindsey Lohan... and you want me to do your assignment. Oh, I would be honored!"

Yup, my sims haven't time for assignments and term papers... there are more important fish to fry. Queenie needs to be working on that future husband... drumroll please... several of you have suggested this man for my legacy, he's not really ugly... but I think he would make an excellent addition.

"Um, well golly gee, Miss Uglacy, I'm not real sure about being part of your legacy. I mean I really, really want to be a legacy sim... but uh, well this is a bit of scraping the bottom of the barrel."

As if you have a choice, Goopy. You know you were destined for us. Besides, who else would let you into a legacy, eh?

"Well you are a purty little alien."

Christy Stratton, get your cheesy butt out of what was going to be a romantic picture! Don't you hate it when creepy townies ruin your photographic moment! Beaver woman! Seriously, have you ever seen Christy's gaping teeth?

What the???

Well apparently the Goopster has a lot of explaining to do. Liking the whole dirty on the farm bit, eh Goopy?

And he's got the hots for River Waters... ewww, on so many levels.

"Listen hear, sonny, I've seen some sickos in my time, but you take the cake! Everyone in this restuarant does not need to see those thought bubbles!"

You tell him, Miss Crumplebottom!!! Whack him with that purse some more!

"So will you agree to the terms Goopy? Want to join the Uglacies?"

"Well , I guess so. Does this mean you'll do unspeakable experiments on me?"

"Do you like duct tape, batteries, flashlights, and Phillips screwdrivers?"

"Oh baby, you talk the language of love."

"Let us shake on it!"

ARRRRGH!

Queenie keeps rolling wants to prank Goopy. Now if that isn't love, what is?

"No Marsha, Queenie can not come to the phone. She is roasting in the sun as we speak. What part of a vampire needs to sleep in a coffin during the day don't you understand?! You really want to keep calling us Marsha, because somewhere there's a satellite with your name on it."

"Bleh, college sucks, it's so boring. I have an idea!"

Let me guess, popularity sim? MMmm, what could you possibly have in your want panel?

"Time to get the party started!"

Valentine party at the Casteroff Dorms! Alright!!! Break out the pineapple keg and the bubble blower!

"mmf, Goopy, I'm so glad you could make it!"

"I wouldn't miss your party for all the bermuda shorts in the world, my little green sweetheart."

Hey, it's valentines! It's going to get sappy.

"Oh my gosh, you're that Lohan girl again..."

"Really, you think I look like her?"

Ilama guy- "Hell no, you don't..."

"Llama guy shut it up! So I was thinking Solveign, how about you do my term paper while we party?"

"I'd love to."

This picture brings back my own college memories, *sigh*, what few I have.

"Someone bring me a funnel!"

JFizzle seems to show up at all the parties. Especially when smustling is involved. And look at little Queenie back there rocking and rolling. She looks like a cross between the coneheads and Elton John.

"Singing in the rain, just singing in the rain... what a wonderful feeling..."

Fred Estaire and Ginger Rodgers you two are not! Too much juicing at the keg, and this is what you get.

"So Ralph, we've been partying all night, and my term paper is due tommorrow. What do you say, biological cousin?"

"Why of course I want to spend the rest of my night working on your paper, Queenie."

Stalker: "Hey, why don't you do your own papers?"

"I have a life, creepy, stalker psychopath, something you wouldn't understand. Now run along Ted Bundy and stop ruining the pictures of my reign!"

"Wow, that was a roof-raising celebration of young adults!"

Yeah, it looks like you really cut loose Queenie. You might want to fix your antenna thingies. Looks like the smustle did them in.

"Samuel, Valentine's day has made me so romantic. Marry me!"

Well good luck with that one Regan. I seem to have problems getting college dormies to ever leave college.

"Oh Goopy, finally, we're alone."

Yeah, in the bed your parents made it in when they were in college. Eewwwww.

"Oh Sam, I'm so glad you said yes!"

"Hey, dude, do you mind? Me and my girlfriend want a little alone time!"

"No, I don't mind at all. Go right ahead."

Seriously, what's with the stalker?! Why do sims continuously stalk the Uglacy family? It can't be their overwhelming beauty or charm.

"Sssh, Regan, you can not tell our parental units, but Goopy and I proclaimed our love biologically."

"Sssh, Queenie, you can't tell mom and dad but Sam and I boinked all night."

Sisterly bonding... but seriously, these girls are always rolling wants to gossip and pillow fight. They're my closest siblings yet.

Queenie! What are you doing out in the sunlight again?!

"I don't know, I just felt like turning the stereo on. I am feeling rather poorly."

That would be because your dying you idiot!

"Arrrgh, I just urinated all over myself!"

That's the least of your worries!

Not to fret, Queenie, Llama guy is to the rescue!

Ok, I knew this was going to happen. Regan get crackin. Time to plead for Queenie like there's no tommorrow... which there won't be, at least for her.

"Oh Grimmy, you can't take my sister. Can't you see how much she means to me, I'm kneeling in her pee puddle for goodness sakes. And I can't be heir... oh man, please don't do this to me."

"So there I was, riding my Harley, and I said to the others, we should call ourselves the Hell Angels. Man, how I miss the leather, the chicks, the feel of the highway. I wanted to get tattooed but they told me I had to have skin, pffft. So I gave up being a biker, I mean if I can't have the tattoos, there's really no point is there?"

"Regan, is he going to bring back Queenie, or what?"

"Look dude, as interesting as your stories are about hanging with Hitler, causing the Bubonic Plague, and the witch-burning trials in Salem, I gotta to get to class. So can you like deliver my sister or what?!"

"Great," *grumbles* "I get to clean up her pee and ashes while she sleeps in a coffin. Man I'll be glad when Sam and I can get our own little house and move away from this madness."

If Sam will actually move out and marry you. But there are always cheats... at least for the spare.

Excuse me, sir? What are you doing here?

"I got a report that some student is hacking grades from this location."

Oh great. Well I'm sure no Uglacy would ever do that... *rolls eyes*

"Miss, I have caught you red-handed. You should be ashamed of yourself. I'm fining you $450."

"What, you must be mistaken, I was just bidding on EBay, I swear!"

Jimminy Crickets! I didn't know cops could confiscate your computer. Thanks a lot Regan!

"Let that be a lesson to you young lady!"

"Uh, yeah, I'll never do that again." *snicker*

Hey Regan, you could at least wait till the cop gets out of the room before you run to the second computer! And you better be writing a term paper this time!

"Ha, dream on."

Meanwhile, back in Uglacyville, I gave my simself a little Valentine present. Oh yes, I found a Russell Crowe, thank you Bacelonista from ModSims! My Valentine is going to be red hot now :D

"Excuse me mate, where am I? Who are you?"

"Just pose for the picture Russell. You're in my legacy now."

"Legacy? Miss, where's my agent, my wife, my kid?"

"Shut up Cinderalla man and smile for the camera."

Oh man, what's a sim girl to do?! Something about those men from down under. Well lets just give me some privacy now, ok? I've had enough butt shots of me on the internet thanks to Hiddenunderabed.

Speaking of which, she's having a lot of trouble making up with Frederico. He is none too happy about that kiss with Gage.

"Frederico, how many times do I have to tell you, it meant nothing."

"Yeah, right, it's that humogous jaw of his, isn't it? Or are you just tired of my dainty nose, my overwhelming good looks that you couldn't resist cro-magnon man?!"

She did, however, get a nifty prize for her dream date with Gage!

A nintendo! Wow, now here's a guy who knows how to treat a woman!

"Freddy, I'm fluffy the valentine bear, and I'm here to tell you that Mel really loves you. Not that fugly, ugly Gage Uglacy."

"Nice try Mel, why don't you go play fluffy bear with Gage, Huh?!"

Resorting to the bear, eh Mel? Where did you get that from, the Dr. Phil show?

Back at the Uglacy home, my heart is breaking for Don. Look at him, playing chess alone. It's all so sad. Samara and Don were perharps one of the greatest legacy couples ever. Which brings me to Don...

Many of you have asked me in my GB if Don is really as autonomous as he seems, or if it is just my crazy writing. Honestly, this sim is like none other I have ever played. Here he is, in all his autonomy and I constantly have to try to keep up with him. He does what he wants, and never ceases to amaze me. He fell in love with Samara with no help from me, he really hates grilled cheese and if I don't watch him, he's making chili...his favorite, which always results in zombie gas. He loves to prank and gossip, and he likes babies... go figure. He adores Carmen, and when Gage cheated on her, he immediatly goosed her to make her feel better. Both his step grand-daughters have a crush on him. Ewww, I know, but he is compelling. Oh yeah, and he loves...

Poker!!! I sometimes take Don to town just to take a break from legacy boredom, and because he is my favorite.

Here he is, taking on Goopy, Kennedy, and Sjt, who finally has made an appearance. Sjt has his own little legacy going, but I guess he took the night off to play cards.

Welcome ladies and gentlemen to the final series of World-class poker. The final four contestants remain.

Goopy Gilsbaro shuffles the cards, the tension is high. This round could make or break these legendary players.

The concentration of these players is just amazing.

Sjt considers his options carefully. Does he take the chance, or should he fold and call it a day?

"I think I can take them."

Good for you Sjt, live in the moment, take a chance, go all in!

Whoa, kaching! Don cleans up, leaving the rest in the dust. Sorry about that Sjt, but trust me, it's best to loose quickly. Zombie hygiene goes down at an alarming rate, and it could get very, very ugly. Nothing like decaying body odor to distract from a game of cards.

"Heh, heh, heh, suckers."

Don actually is very good at poker and chess. It is possible he cheats. Possible, hell, more like probable.

While downtown, who should Don run into but Frederico, who is whining to everyone about Mel and Gage's kiss. Here they are hanging out in the Gothier Green's TV room, which frankly creeps me out. I mean a TV room at a cemetary, what??? So you won't miss your favorite soap while they bury your loved one?

"So I couldn't believe it, I walked in, and she was kissing Gage!"

"So I care why?"

Look sim me! Butting in as usual. "Hey aren't you that Frederico guy?"

"So I heard Mel kissed Gage Uglacy."

Gads, what an awful picture, and yet it tells it's own story. Don is thinking about brains, and probably that niether my simself or Frederico have any.

"Look Fred, if Mel was kissing Gage, well you must not be paying enough attention to her. Because, that just reeks of desperation."

"Wow Don, that's so deep, I never thought of that. I mean I haven't taken her bowling or out to watch TV at the graveyard lately."

"Well, there you go. Take her out to karaoke... no woman can resist that."

"Man, you sure know how to fix a broken heart."

"Alas, if only I could fix my own. Alone without my Samara. Whatever can I do?"

"Hey Don, I got a plan, you being my favorite sim and all."

"Does it involve getting the hell out of that Uglacy home, because frankly, I'm ready for retirement."

"Uh, no, I need you to finish those 200 grilled cheese sandwiches for me. But in the meantime..."

"Hhmmm, 666-DEAD. Wonder why I'm dialing this number?"

There was only one thing to do.

"Don Uglacy, you brought me back as zombie!"

"Turn about is fair play, baby. Ha, ha, get a load of that blush. Maybe we can get you some make-up in a nice shade of corpse blue."

"By the way Don, while I remember you, we no longer have a relationship, because frankly Death is the ultimate divorce. And I'm not too happy with you bringing me back as a zombie. So now you must woo me all over again."

Frickin, fracking game!!! How was I to know that zombifying someone could possibly make them somewhat unhappy with you. Well stay tuned, I have a part two, in which I shall answer the burning questions:

Will Don win Samara back?
Will Frederico forgive Mel's date with Gage?
What will Mil's illegimate child to Gage look like?
Will Queenie marry Goopy, or somebody else???
And which simself becomes the ultimate stalker?!

Well you will just have to go to part 2 to find out... because I'm at 100 pictures, and I've got more, so many more! See ya there!